Her cheeks appeared to be on the verge of breaking from the size of her smile. Her small hands encircled her infant sister tenderly, just as she had pictured in her mind’s eye countless times.
Lina’s bright red suspenders stood out against the yellow blanket that was tightly wrapped around the newborn, but she didn’t give a damn about appearances or color. Being the older sister made her proud.
With my heart both full and delicate, I fell back on the hospital bed, fatigued and hurting, with hormones and sutures rushing through me. Lina had been our only kid for four crazy years, and she kissed my bloated stomach every night.
With wide-eyed optimism, she would inquire every morning, “Is she arrived yet?Finally, the baby was here now. Maybe now, I reasoned, everything will be all right.
Slowly, Lina leaned in till her face nearly touched her sister’s little nose. She lowered her voice to almost a whisper, as though she were disclosing a secret that only they knew.
“I have someone to keep the secrets with now,” she remarked.
Startled, I blinked. “Secrets?”
Still beaming with joy, she nodded. “Such as the ones I keep from Dad.”
She comforted me, “It’s okay,” as she raised her large brown eyes before I could question what she meant. She also refuses to tell.
I suppressed a little laugh as a knot formed in my chest. “Well,” I remarked carelessly, “babies can’t talk yet.” However, what sort of secrets?”
She kissed her sister’s forehead, paused, and then leaped from her chair. “I am hungry,” she declared plainly. Can you give me a cookie?”
It appeared to be nothing more than a child’s naive fantasy at the time. Always imaginative, Lina made up tales about a dragon called Toffee and said that clouds served as pillows for God. However, I couldn’t get those words out of my head, and they left me with an unanswered question.
I didn’t bring it up to James that evening. I didn’t want to concern him with odd child whispers because his job was hard and I was still recovering along with Lina and the baby.
When Elsie came home two days later, Lina became the ideal big sister. While the baby slept, she brought diapers, scolded her toy giraffe for making too much noise, and sung gentle lullabies. However, the “secrets” were lost after that initial reference. Or so I believed.
The rumors didn’t start up again until a wet Tuesday two months later. I was half asleep on the couch nursing Elsie when I heard Lina talking gently while she played with her dollhouse in the living room.
“No, Daddy isn’t informed. The rule is that.
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